Author: Philip Snyder

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‘It takes a village’

“It takes a village” is an African proverb that means that an entire community of people must interact with children for them to experience and grow in a safe and healthy environment.

Many of us have commented in jest to our friends, “it takes a village” when trying to corral an unruly child at a birthday party or playdate. As we are having a difficult time, we lean on our friends to ease the burden.

This phrase is commonly spoken in the context of the parent’s point of view.

What about the child’s point of view?

Shouldn’t all children have the benefit of a village to experience life and grow in a safe and healthy environment?

What if the child does not grow up with parents, let alone an entire village? What if, instead of birthday parties and playdates, a child is forced to sleep on distant relatives’ couches, or worse, in a homeless shelter?

This is the life of many foster children, right in our back yard.

It is unfair and sad that so many children grow up bouncing around between group homes or private homes of “foster parents” because of their parental neglect, abuse, or drug use.

Not many people are willing to help even one foster child, let alone hundreds of foster children that need not only the essentials (shelter and food), but positivity, support, and guidance to become successful members of society.

In part, because of one woman’s time and dedication, foster children in Broward County have a village to call their own.

Jillian Smath is the CEO of SOS Children’s Villages, a residential foster care community in Coconut Creek. SOS has 15 buildings around a cul-de-sac – 13 foster homes, a community center, and an administrative office. The 13 homes foster approximately 60 children at any given time.

Jillian lives in Parkland with her husband, Lee, and daughters, Emily, 16 and Marlee, 14.

Before being promoted to CEO in 2015, Jillian started at SOS in 1997 as a case manager. Jillian learned about SOS while working for the Department of Children and Families (“DCF”).

While at DCF, Jillian remembers having a little girl on her caseload who was bouncing from foster home to foster home as nobody wanted to keep her for any extended period. She was a very outspoken and spirited little girl, which presented a challenge for many foster parents.

One of Jillian’s coworkers told her about SOS and she made the referral. Jillian brought her out to SOS for an interview and immediately fell in love with what she saw. She placed this little girl in March of 1997 and then read the classifieds every day in hopes that a job opportunity would open. A few months later a position became available.

“The little girl is now 34,” Jillian says proudly, “a mom and a part of my life – she calls me her godmother.”

Over the past 23 years Jillian’s efforts securing donations and grants and overseeing the foster parents have transformed SOS into one of the largest foster care villages in the state.

Jillian has met every child that ever lived at SOS, approximately 800 children. She has seen the impact SOS has made on these children as many of them go on to college or a trade school and stay in Broward County. Without SOS, these children would not have been given the opportunity to succeed. Their success makes our entire community stronger.

Jillian remains in touch with most of “her children” – many of whom now have families of their own. Her children continuously remind her that they owe their success to SOS.

The holidays are special times for families. Jillian is helping create a village for those who would be alone.

To learn more about SOS Broward or how you can donate, please visit www.sosflorida.com.

Philip Snyder, Esq. is a partner at Lyons and Snyder, a Plantation law firm specializing in personal injury.

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You, too, can make a difference

What if one day you woke up and said to yourself:

  • I am going to do something good for others by forming a charity and
    creating a fundraising event that raises money for sick children.
  • I am going to raise money by hosting a Whiffle Ball Tournament as the
    flagship event.
  • I will coordinate food trucks, live entertainment, and a Home Run Derby.
  •  People will love it!

Now imagine telling your altruistic and lofty plans to your significant other and family and friends …And that is where the story usually ends.

The naysayers will quickly rain on your parade by reminding you: (1) you have no experience starting a charity; (2) you do not have a team of organizers or volunteers to help you run this charity; (3) it will take dozens, if not hundreds of hours, to set up this charity; and (4) you have a full-time job with three young children.

But you are not Todd Rodman. 

Todd Rodman is the president of Sports Chiropractic and Natural Health Solutions. Todd lives in Parkland with his wife Lorin, the “do-it-all” wife who writes a lifestyle and fashion blog, “Styled as a Mother” and his three children, Jack (11), Reese (9) and Austin (7).

The Rodmans are the family that wear elaborate costumes for Halloween, constantly post funny videos to social media, and hold impromptu driveway musicals for their neighbors’ enjoyment. They are Parkland’s version of the social media darlings, the Holderness Family.

In 2017, Todd, in conjunction with the Jason Taylor Foundation, organized the Inaugural “Whiffle Blast,” which took place at Pine Trails Park in Parkland.

Todd, a college baseball player, came up with the idea for a Wiffleball tournament while playing a pick-up game with his family. Now going on their fifth year, Whiffle Blast has raised over $125,000 for children battling cancer and other pediatric emergencies. Every penny donated goes toward charity.

Whiffle Blast, a Whiffleball round-robin tournament, may be the most fun charity event you will ever attend. It is super competitive, but all for a good cause. Last year, 30 teams battled it out to be crowned champion.

Hundreds cheered on the Home Run derby.

Who knew Wiffleball could be so intense?

Having no experience planning a fundraising event, all while running a successful business, the first year was challenging at times. Todd and Lorin cobbled together their plans on scraps of notebook paper.

They relied on grassroots efforts to promote the event and procure entertainment and raffle items.

They spent sleepless nights calling restaurants for gift certificates, coordinating food trucks, making DIY signs, and baking cookies to make sure the event was not a failure. Even their children contributed by getting their friends to work as volunteers.

Friends and family were so inspired by Todd’s desire to give back to his community, that they also chipped in and tapped their connections to make the event a success.

When I asked Todd why he started a charity he said, “Giving back to our community is so important to me because I understand what it’s like to be on the other side of the fence. I was inspired by the people before me who I look up to in the philanthropic community to pay it forward.”

Todd’s advice to anyone who wants to give back to their community: “Just do it. Yes, it is hard. Yes, it is a lot of work. And yes, it is the single most rewarding thing you can do with both your time and money. Your community will rally around you – they will not let you fail.”

Be inspired by Todd. Anyone can make a  difference – it is never too late. Do not get caught up in negativity. Do not be afraid to take chances. Parkland / Coral Springs is a resilient community that rallies around each other. To quote the movie Field of Dreams, “If you build it, he will come.” Todd Rodman built “Whiffle Blast” – that is his community legacy. What will you build? What will be your community legacy?

To learn more about Whiffle Blast check out https://jasontaylorfoundation.com/events/ whiffle-blast/. Start practicing hitting curve balls now as Whiffle Blast is on January 23, 2021.

Philip Snyder, Esq. is a partner at Lyons and Snyder, a Plantation law firm specializing in personal injury.

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‘The limit does not exist’

I attended K-12 in Coral Springs in the 80s and 90s. At Ramblewood Middle School, my assigned special subject was computers. We played a lot of Oregon Trail and Odell Lake and used primitive coding to create King Kong climbing up computer screens (yes, we actually stacked computer screens on top of each other).

My computers special was 100 percent boys. 100 percent boys! I remember asking my guidance counselor if I could change my special to peer counseling. For those who went to Ramblewood Middle School, the peer counselors put on a yearly show, “Just say no to drugs” to the song, Total Eclipse of the Heart – the pep rally was terrible and awesome at the same time. I was told I could not be a peer counselor because there were already too many girls signed up and they “needed me” in computers. This was an accepted trend growing up; boys were “needed” in technology and science while girls were “needed” in the soft sciences and arts.

Growing up, our teachers constantly preached, “You can be whatever you want when you grow up.” What they really meant to say was, “You can be whatever you want when you grow up … as long as it’s gender
appropriate.”

Fast forward to 2020.

Kristen Meis

Kristin Meis is the Engineering and Robotics Specialist at Park Trails Elementary. Kristin also serves as the school’s liaison for the Math and Science departments for the district. This year, Kristin was nominated for the Presidential Award for Excellence in Mathematics and Science, after being awarded Teacher of the Year at Park Trails Elementary for the 2019-2020 school year. The Presidential Award is the highest recognition a teacher can receive in the United States.

The idea of a woman receiving the Presidential Award for Mathematics and Science, for Engineering and Robotics, nonetheless, may have seemed crazy to some 30 years ago. Science teachers were predominantly men. English teachers were predominantly women.

Now, because of trailblazers like Kristin, all children, both boys and girls, are encouraged to love STEM disciplines (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math) at a young age. Kristin resides in Parkland with her husband Rob and two children, Macy, 14 and RJ, 12. Kristin became a teacher in 1999 after graduating with her Master’s in Education from the University of Florida. Kristin accepted the Engineering and Robotics position at Park Trails last year after having been a classroom teacher there since 2013. She was excited about students solving problems (Kristin calls them “design challenges”) with not only their minds but with their hands.

She created her Engineering and Robotics lab with students in mind – shelves line one wall filled with materials students use throughout the year. Kristin encourages her students to use engineering and design processes — ask, imagine, plan, create, improve, and communicate — to solve problems. The materials wall serves to expand her students’ minds while providing them with limitless opportunities to find solutions. Students learn not by memorizing formulas, but by working through challenges in teams.

For example, during virtual learning, the intermediate grades created a “Helping Hand” for their design challenge using just straws, strings, and tape. This exercise led to an in-depth discussion between her students about different body systems, particularly the skeletal system and the 206 bones in their body. Her students learned about the 27 bones in each hand, 26 bones in each foot, and more.

In a world where children are on their devices for hours on end, Kristin challenges them to think creatively and “outside the box.” Kristin loves creating novel ways to teach her students while not relying on traditional textbooks. Like Mr. Miyagi teaching Daniel LaRusso (The Karate Kid, 1984), Kristin’s students may not even realize that she is arming them with life skills that will help them throughout their entire lives and in the workforce.

Kristin is an inspiration to all women who were ever told that STEM is a “boys world.” Girls can be whatever they want when they grow up. To use a science term, “They are bound by nothing.” Better yet, to use a quote from Cady Heron in Mean Girls, “The limit does not exist!”

Parkland is lucky to have not only a Presidential Award-Nominated Mathematics and Science teacher, but an amazing person who loves her students and her career. Thank you, Kristin, for encouraging a lifelong love of robotics and engineering to boys and girls. Let us all root for Kristin to be recognized in Washington in 2021 as one of the best Mathematics and Science teachers in the country!

Philip Snyder is a partner in the Delray Beach law firm Lyons Snyder Collins.

 

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A unicorn lives among us

Takers try to gain as much as possible from their interactions while contributing as little as they can in return.

Givers are others-focused and tend to provide support with no strings attached. They ask themselves, “How can I add value to society? What can I contribute?”

And then there are anonymous givers. These people give with no strings attached; they seek no acknowledgment or recognition.

In this time of social media and self-promotion, anonymous givers are unicorns. Ryan Paton is a unicorn.

Ryan grew up in Coral Springs. His family still lives in Coral Springs
and Parkland. Ryan is a successful mortgage broker in town, but that is not what makes Ryan unique, however.

Over the past 15 years, Ryan has donated over 20 gallons of blood
and platelets. These donations place Ryan in the top 1% of all blood donors in the country. Amazingly, however, Ryan cringes when he sees a needle. Donating platelets is painful and is a two-hour commitment.

When I asked Ryan why he continues to give blood if he is afraid of needles, Ryan said, “I sometimes shed tears when I think about the recipients that are going to receive my blood. The sick children, and sick moms and dads that are fighting for their lives. It’s not fair that when I’m finished with my platelet donation, I get to go about my day while the recipients getting my blood have to also deal with the same needle that I’m scared of, but they are in the midst of a battle for their life. They are praying for a miracle when they get that blood I just gave. So, when I consider that, it makes me want to brave that needle and donate so much more. If my blood/platelets have even a slight chance to cure or extend the life of even one person, all those hours of needles will be worth it.”

I’ve known Ryan for 20 years. I eat lunch with him almost every Wednesday. Until last year, I never knew he was a blood donor. Ryan never speaks about it. It’s a 100% selfless act. In fact, there is only one thing Ryan ever seems to talk about – Honor Flight.

In 2012, Ryan asked a few friends, including myself, to donate a few dollars to support an organization called Honor Flight. No one ever heard of Honor Flight, but we were happy to help Ryan. The mission of Honor Flight is to transport America’s veterans to Washington, D.C. to visit the memorials dedicated to honoring those who have served and saved our country. In 2012, very few people in South Florida had heard of Honor Flight.

Since 2012, Ryan took the initiative to co-found the South Florida branch of Honor Flight. As the current Director of Operations, he has helped coordinate the transport of over 1000 veterans to their Memorials in Washington, D.C. Many veterans have told Ryan that this trip was the highlight of their lives. They cannot believe that an organization made the effort to recognize them for doing their civic duty in America’s time of need.

Veterans are the ultimate givers. They gave so others didn’t have to. They fought so we could be free. Sadly, many veterans never received any type of honor for their service and sacrifice. Ryan donates his time and raises money so they are recognized.

As you may expect, Ryan never asks for any recognition at Honor Flight events and fundraisers. The focus is ALWAYS on the veterans, never on himself. Also, Ryan has no real ties to the military. His involvement is solely altruistic because it’s the right thing to do.

Getting Ryan to send me a bio about why he gives blood or his
involvement in Honor Flight was like pulling teeth. Oftentimes,
givers don’t like to be recognized because they believe it diverts the
attention away from the mission. I disagree. Our community can (and
should) rally around givers like Ryan. Giving blood is thankless, but
crucial. It is the ultimate act of a giver. You are anonymously giving
your health (at great expense) to someone in need who you will never
meet. You give because you know others will not.

Supporting our veterans is honorable. You are recognizing someone who has already given the ultimate sacrifice who was not afforded the recognition they deserved.

Next time you walk past the Big Red Blood Bus, think of Ryan’s sacrifice and the good you could be doing for others.

And consider sponsoring a veteran and/or chaperoning a trip to Washington D.C. through HonorFlightSouthFlorida.org so they can be recognized for their service.

Selfless acts such as giving are what makes our community special. Thank you, Ryan, for all you (anonymously) do.

Philip Snyder is a partner with the law firm of Lyons, Snyder & Collin in Plantation. He was writing our Legal Matters column for us but said he wanted to try something different, highlighting special people in the community. We decided to let him give it a try. Let us know what you think, email: editor@theparklander.com.

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Legal Matters: Coronavirus takes a swing at marriage

The most common question I have been asked during the past several months is, “Are you seeing an uptick in divorces as a result of the Coronavirus?”
The answer is yes.

Although there are many reasons besides COVID-19 for this uptick in filings, my firm attributes the financial stress, the quarantine of the people to their homes, and the uncertainty of the future as the catalysts for the rise in divorce filings.

Humans can only handle so much stress and uncertainty before it affects their mental health and personalities. The “new-normal of quarantine” now includes varying amounts of financial worries, job security, boredom, inability to escape, lack of intimacy, stress over home-schooling, stress over social-distancing, etc. There also appears to be no end in sight.

People are depressed and are realizing that life is short. Husbands and wives are spending hours each day scrolling through Facebook and Instagram and re-evaluating their past life choices. If they are not happy in any facet of their
life (including their marriage), they are choosing to throw in their cards and
go to another table. Some people are blaming their marital issues on the
pandemic to make it easier to explain to friends and family why they are seeking a divorce.

Try to remember back to your pre-pandemic routine. After accounting for work, gym, kids’ activities, Publix, driving to and from various other activities, you spent a couple of hours a day with your spouse, at most, excluding the time you both are sleeping. Now you’re Bill Murray in Groundhog’s Day, spending 24/7 with your spouse. You have nothing to dilute your time. There is no outlet. There is no place to hide (work, bar, or gym). There is no one to vent to outside of your spouse. There are only so many times you can watch The Office or bike ride around the neighborhood before you crave additional socialization.

If a couple is having trouble, most of their interactions will now be neutral or negative. Patience is short and tensions are high. Like Jerry Seinfeld or Elaine Benes, if your spouse eats their peas one at a time, likes a cotton Dockers commercial, or uses too many exclamation points, it may now be a reason for a fight. If your relationship was already shaky, the quarantine has put lighter fluid on the coals that were already burning.

Spouses also have to contend with disputes over social distancing and parenting styles. As people are working from home, they can now observe how their spouse interacts with their children during the day. Spouses are concerned over their partner’s parenting and discipline style and are criticizing
how their spouse spends their time and questions their judgment.

This list goes on and on … we have heard some divorce consults complain that they believe their spouse is irresponsible for not social distancing and/or wearing a mask, in disagreement whether to send their children to school or embarrassed that their spouse refuses to pay for private school.

The stress is piling up!

Oh, and by the way, the country is dealing with a divisive presidential race — always a fun topic to discuss when you’re already on edge.

Hopefully, the numbers in South Florida will become softer so people can start
the road back to normalcy and reduce their stress levels. If not, divorces may
continue to rise.

 

By Philip Snyder, Esq.

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I’m a proud #girldad

On February 23, 2013, my life changed. I gained not only a beautiful baby girl but also a best friend. I am a #girldad.

After the tragic passing of Kobe Bryant, ESPN anchor Elle Duncan shared on SportsCenter a story about meeting Bryant for the first (and only) time. Bryant pridefully spoke about his three girls and his excitement over the possibility of having a fourth.

Duncan asked Bryant if he wanted more children. Without hesitation Bryant said, “I would have five more girls if I could. I’m a GIRL DAD.„ The hashtag “girldad” was born and quickly went viral. I was one of the millions of dads who reposted a picture of my daughter, Harper, and I playing basketball. In honor of Kobe, I used #girldad.

I am lucky enough to have two children, a girl (Harper, age 7) and a boy (Hudson, age 3).

I always knew I would have a great relationship with my son, as most dads do. Like many dads, however, my relationship with my daughter is just “special.”

I brag about my daughter, ad nauseam. Pictures of her are peppered throughout my office. My friends sometimes roll their eyes at me when I tell yet another story about the time Harper did “fill in the blank.”

The truth is, I am just so darn proud of her. In my eyes, she is perfect in every way.

Looking back, however, I have been the proudest of her when she and I do something together that defies stereotypes. In those moments, I know I am raising her the way Bryant raised his daughters.

Bryant, one of the most competitive and ruthless athletes of all-time, did not see gender as a barrier to his daughters having the same opportunities and privileges as boys.

In decades past, dads of girls interacted differently with them than dads of boys. Dads were expected to do traditional “boy activities” with their sons and “girl activities” with their daughters. Society placed limits on what fathers and daughters should do.

Boys played sports. Girls danced and cheered.

Boys went camping. Girls had tea parties.

Boys lead. Girls followed.

Parkland, Broward County, the world, in fact, is full of dads who have amazing relationships with their daughters. These are dads who post a myriad of pictures on social media of them with their daughters at concerts, sporting events, or catching fish. These are dads that are not embarrassed to perform in “Dancing Dads” at Dance Theater, or that take time off from work to watch their daughter perform in the school play.

Many of these dads feel the same way about their daughters’ limitless potential and want their daughters to know that they are supporting them every step of the way.

#Girldads want their daughters to be fearless, brave, assertive, take chances, make mistakes, and strive for greatness in everything they do–athletics or otherwise.

#Girldads are proud of their daughters for being true to themselves regardless of what others think they should be.

#Girldads embrace the fact that they get to experience the best of both worlds.

#Girldads always let their daughters know that they can accomplish anything–the world is their oyster!

A typical day with Harper includes dancing in the family room as well as practicing free throws.

One night we may watch Goonies or The Sandlot; the next night, The Princess Diaries or Troop Beverly Hills.

It is just as likely Harper and I will film a TikTok video or throw a football in the backyard.

The best part about living in Parkland as a #girldad may be Parkland Rec Sports. Don’t believe me? Attend a Friday Night Lights football game. #GirlDads are just as intensely cheering for their daughters as they are for their sons. The girls have a blast. The parents have a blast. It may be the best draw of Parkland – #girldads galore!

Many of the dads coach their son’s teams and their daughter’s teams. These #girldads get to the field at 5:00 p.m. and don’t leave until 9:00 p.m. They treat all their children equally.

Parkland Rec Sports is shattering stereotypes of who is an athlete.

By encouraging Harper to engage in traditional boy activities, she is gaining traits that will propel her ahead as she moves forward in life: Self-confidence, willingness to take criticism, strong sense of focus, humility, resiliency and the ability to learn from setbacks, and a sense of belonging, just to name a few. These traits are equally important to boys and girls.

A bunch of Parkland dads take their girls camping multiple times per year. Camping builds character and takes them out of their comfort zone. Some of the best conversations Harper and I have ever had are from lying in our tents discussing life or laughing about the time there was no dedicated shower area on site so I washed her off with a hose (Shh, don’t tell mom). These dads will tell you camping with their daughters is just magical.

Parkland #girldads are some of the best around. You’ll notice them now – they are the ones holding their daughter’s hand
as they walk through the mall, belting out songs in the car with the windows down, or volunteering for a role in the Enchanted Tales with Belle attraction at Disney World.

Dads – don’t be afraid to play dress up and catch with your daughter. Embrace the societal shift. Gender doesn’t dictate what she can and cannot do. Just be proud of her, empower her to lead the way, and support her choices. Hold her hand tight and tell her you love her, as there is nothing better than being a #girldad.

By Philip Snyder

Philip Snyder writes the Legal Matters column for the Parklander. 

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Are we witnessing the end of LIVE Jury Trials?

As a result of COVID, circuits around the country are experimenting with remote jury trials. Broward County Chief Circuit Judge Jack Tuter, along with the American Board of Trial Advocates, are leading the charge. The State, if not the country, is watching. How do you create a system that moves cases without jeopardizing the rights of the parties?

Besides the basic challenges of how to call witnesses and enter exhibits, what happens if there is a technology glitch (i.e. wifi goes out)? Worse yet, how can we ensure the jurors are not playing Mario Kart during closing arguments if there is no one to monitor their actions?

As a litigator, I can attest that remote meetings via Zoom can be quite advantageous for routine hearings such
as status conferences, discovery disputes, and even dispositive motions. Remote hearings save attorneys a tremendous amount of time. I have personally waited hours in a filled courtroom for a judge to say, “Hello, Mr. Snyder. Your motion for continuance was granted. I’ll see you in eight weeks.” These “time-drains” would be eliminated with remote hearings.

Jury trials, however, are a whole different animal.

Some parts of trials are already remote. In many civil trials, doctor’s testimony is presented via video. Although these videos must be edited to account for objections (and cost an arm and a leg), they are very efficient. Push play and sit down.

Juries many times do not appreciate the “controlled chaos” within the courtroom. Attorneys may spend hundreds, if not thousands of hours preparing for a trial. Even if the attorney knows the case “like the back of his hand” and has thought of every possible contingency, there are always unavoidable curveballs. To quote Ross Geller, attorneys must “PIVOT” and plow ahead. These “on-the-fly” adjustments are much more challenging on a ZOOM platform.

Jury trials are equal style and substance. Trial attorneys lend an air of gravitas to the proceedings. The best trial attorneys are orchestra conductors who seamlessly make dozens of strategic decisions on the fly like: (1) how close the stand to a jury; (2) when to make eye contact with a particular juror; (3) when to pregnant pause; (4) when to put a hand on their client’s shoulder; (5) when to smile/scowl; (6) when to object / how forcefully to object, and (7) when to just remain silent and let the witness sink their own case.

Non-verbal communications are sometimes more important than what is said. During my last criminal trial, I made eye contact with a juror during my cross examination of the lead detective. I knew right then and there my argument was gaining traction. The juror observed what I observed-the lead detective squirming in his chair and become visibly irate. I dug-in deeper and really pushed the issue. My client was acquitted. The juror was the foreperson. This connection would have been lost in a remote trial.

We may have the technology to conduct remote trials, but technology does not transfer the human emotion and connection – these are vital elements of a fair jury trial.

I do not envy the people who need to decide on when we get back to live trials and in what capacity. It is a delicate balance. With the support of our hard-working Judges and trial bar, Broward County is on the right-side of the curve. I am confident they will be able to come to a happy medium balancing technology with human elements.

By Philip Snyder, Esp.

Philip Snyder is a personal injury attorney at Lyons, Snyder & Collin.

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